Saturday, August 28, 2010

California Dreamin........

***Before I begin...grazie to all of you for all your beautiful & healing thoughts & prayers for our daughter Ashley & our family...I want to tell you how much they have meant & how powerful your loving thoughts have been... less than 6 weeks after her car accident...w/ a broken pelvis and all...she was walking w/o a walker, crutches or cane & even more incredible... 3 months after her accident...on this day at the beach...she ran towards the waves and let the water engulf her & laughed with such loud & un-abandoned happiness! & all I could do... was look up at the sky & cry silent tears behind my sunglasses as I witnessed how powerful love & prayer can truly be...Grazie from the depth of my heart mis amores! ***

California Dreamin.....

That is how I feel I am living these days......although...the song Hotel California by the Eagles is what was playing on my Ipod as the picture below was taken...But as I sat on the sand and walked along the shore wetting my toes and looking for ocean treasures... Some great tunes were blastin on my Ipod.... some songs I am not sure many of you would smile at...I was also rockin AC/DC, Led Zeppelin and even some Daddy Yankee, Usher and yes even some Andrea Bocelli! Because if you could hear my life's playlist that plays in that lil jukebox in my pretty much is the same as what is on my Ipod...a crazy mix of wonderfulness, In fact the whole time I was writing this long ass'd post... Led Zeppelin's Kashmir was blastin on my Ipod ...Cause yes mis amores......that's how I roll :)

( My youngest Anaissa & I...taken by Ashley, my oldest...from her cell phone!)
Nissa was actually trying to lift me up and toss me in this picture...but instead it looks like she was lovin on her mami :)

As Summer comes to a close...we decided to play hooky on Thursday.... I canceled all my afternoon errands & plans and told my kids to just grab whatever they didn't mind getting wet in & we grabbed some sandwiches from Subways' along with lots of fruits and water and headed out to Dockweiler, a great beach that I spent many a great days of my youth at and that to this day...also, holds such wonderful memories from high school, of bonfires...coolers....M&M's... dancing to wonderful music & hanging out with all my friends... Where did those days go?? Now I am the mami of an almost 20 & 14 yr. old....

I don't know about you...but I ADORE everything that is ocean related, from the waves, sand, salty air, seagulls trying to steal my lunch...even spotting yucky ocean things like jellyfish & sandcrabs :) But... I am also the first to admit to the fact that as much as I LOVE the ocean with a passion....I also HATE it with such....sometimes so much so that I stay away for years at a time and then cry when I think of past memories.... even as I miss it so much.... I can hardly breath from the pain of missing everything about it.....

I grew up in the So Bay in Southern California....& when I tell you that I am a beach girl through & through...I kid you not...yes...I might not fit the mold that comes to mind when one thinks.... Cali beach girl (blond hair, blue eyes) but from the time that I can remember I was at the beach from sun up to sun down all along the So Cal Coast...I knew every beach like the back of my hand in a time when as kids we were allowed to go off & explore all on our own, we had certain times we had to be back by...when the tide came in...lunchtime...when the water started to glisten w/golden colors...dinner...snacks coming back to the cooler as your tummy told you to feed it! Yes those were definitely the days of my most treasured childhood memories....

Until I was 10...I always thought that when my parents said they wanted seafood for meant get ready we were off to the beach...cause daddy was going scuba diving to get fresh fish, crabs or lobster and mami was catching fish on her pole or we kids would be diggin for clams....this was my life...until August of 79....when I was 10 & my daddy "lil girl daddy" as I often refer to him was killed...after that...the Ocean and I...well to say our relationship changed...would be putting it mildly.....and it was then that I learned that "normal people" when they wanted seafood...either went to the seafood dept at their local grocery store or to a restaurant to fill that cravin......& me....well that just sucked ;)

Oh, but how I all really need to keep me on track here...been so long since I did one of my long ass'd posts that I keep going off in my heads lil bank of memories and the thoughts just start flooding out......So now back to this summer day in the here & now...

BTW....all the pictures on this post were taken by my youngest Anaissa with her cell phone camera! As you all know....I HATE having my pictures taken...because some how I ALWAYS come out looking like a total goober...I always threaten anyone w/a camera and as most of you know...everyone now has to post them on their FaceBook....I ask you....WHY?????
Well on this day...I forgot to confiscate their cells & learn mami!

So we set up on the sand near the shore.... the kids took off to play in the surf & I began to let myself relax (I always have to take a few breaths and clear my mind when I come to the is my own little "thing" I have to do) and enjoy hearing and seeing the airplanes taking off over the ocean from LAX down the road and I am just looking up & feeling the warm sun on my face as the proof shows below... & then later that night....the picture below and all the others, greeted me on my cell...thanks to my daughter Nissa! Thanks mamas :) Had I known when she took them, I more than likely would have made her delete girl for waiting till I was in bed to send to me ;)

(no...not working the Seks my daughters say...I was just feeling the warm sun on my face)

My nephew Jordan & I walking along the waters edge hunting for ocean treasures for me :) In the far distance ahead of us, you can see a HUGE was holding a car suspended in the air...they were filming something that afternoon and someone was up in that car for hours! I totally felt for them...whoever they may be...but the crew was really nice....& I never once thought to ask what they were filming lol

Further down on our ocean treasure hunt...I spotted something in the water floating towards me and almost stepped into it a few times...

Below is the little beauty that I almost stepped on...there were alot of jellyfish on the shore that day...

After that exciting encounter...I continued on my merry way...listening to my Ipod, crackberry (blackberry phone) in my hand and keeping sooo many memories at bay in my head...believe it or not...listening to my music helps me with that....alot

Yay me....I found a treasure!! One of many, found by my girls, nephew & me that day! ;) Can you see the cords from my Ipod and it's radio remote all wrapped up with the cord from my blouse..yes...I was a mess...but look can also see my crackberry....cause...thats how I roll.........

After being completely worn out... from my ocean treasure expedition and eating 1/2 my veggie sandwich...did I mention I have become an accidental vegetarian? Well I have...and I love it along with the cool side effects like shrinking a few sizes and lbs...w/o trying, not to mention my healthier hair & just feeling better all around...who knew???? Not I!

But...this is me after all that excitement...sitting watching the colors of the sand and water changing to the beautiful hues of golds and bronzes as the sun is beginning to set....And I am all at once....feeling a little ill at ease and yet strangely at peace & giving tearful thanks for all that I was witness to on this day.....

(the wind kept pushing my cow boy hat up, after awhile...I just gave up...)

This was the beauty... that we spent an afternoon in anticipation worth it! I am hoping I get to come back again soon and watch...and not have to wait so long in between my visits...because I don't know which pains me more...coming and remembering.....or staying away and missing this.......

Well mis amores.....this lil (stop laughing June :) post was a preshow to what is to come...see a while back I had written a story about some of my childhood memories of the ocean, its beautiful treasures & my dad Bob...and then almost a year ago while visiting my dear friend Nancy of the ever so beautiful blog...Fete et Fleur...well she had posted about a beautiful tiny little mermaid crown that she had made and well....I have to tell you, that......I had fallen in love with it so hard & completely...that my eyes watered from the memories it conjured up in my heart & mind.... Stay tuned for the outcome of that lil story! Grazie Nancy...because everytime I walk by my lil treasure... my heart skips a beat & I am once my hearts eye....daddy's lil girl, walking on the beach behind him, forever his shadow....

Well until next time my dear friends......


LiLi M. said...

Hello there Rose, I have missed so many of your adventures due to some (to say it mildly) internet problems and a very nice vacation. I read that you had some severe problems, but as I understand you and your daughter are climbing the way up again, great!
Wonderful photos of you in California, I love it, though I hate jellyfish! Have a nice Sunday!

Tammy@T's Daily Treasures said...

Hi Rose, I just love your posts -- so full of you and your heart. A mix of sadness and laughter. Sounds like we like the same kind of music. A big mix of classic rock and everything in between. Love it! The beach is beautiful, what a lovely, peaceful day it must have been. My bod just doesn't like the sun anymore. I break out in big rashes if I get out in it. I can see that you were pretty covered up. I'd have to do the same. I do love the sound of the water and feeling the sand between my toes and finding ocean treasures along the way. So glad to hear that your daughter is so much better. I body surfed down our stairwell the other day and that was scary enough, happened in a split second. Cannot imagine what you daughter through, but thank God she has emerged victorious. Wishing you all the best this Sunday. May you have a wonderful week ahead. Best wishes, Tammy

Unknown said...

So happy to hear that you are back, all is well, and you are smiling and laughing again. The pics. that you took at the beach are beautiful. I perfect reminder of a perfect day.

Rebecca Nelson said...

Growing up in So Cali I loved the ocean, too. When we moved away in 1974 it was the one thing I missed more than anything else... Oklahoma is truly beautiful~Indian Sky Sunsets and lovely changes of seasons. But, my heart will always live in Cali and my love of her oceans will never stop pressing in on me and calling me back to my homeland.

I'm thankful today for God's hand on your girl. Prayer is the key.

I'm no vegetarian...but almost. Not on purpose but my body just doesn't want meat don't eat it. I'll eat chicken ONCE in a while and SOMETIMES fish...mostly though I pass on it all.

You've been missed my friend~more than I can say.

Love to you and peace as your life returns to normal.


Anonymous said...

What beautiful photos, and looks like you had a wonderful day....Kathy

stefanie said...

I am so glad you had a great time...I love that your daughter ran to the waves!!!! I think your dad was looking down on you in that picture with your face to the warmth!!!!

June said...

Rose, I'm certainly not laughing right now...I am crying. Crying over this beautiful (albeit long ass'd) post. Not only are the pictures of you beautiful, but the words are touching every place in my heart. No, you must not stay away, you must bravely go and face the memories, and continue to be our sweet Rose!
Thank you so much for the tears and for your sweet friendship. I feel so blessed.

Carole said...

Whew I made it!!! lol
but it was worth it. Boy girl you made up for lost time but I love reading about all you memories of the ocean. If I lived in California I would spend all my time there too. It's different where we are on Long Island Sound...basically means NO waves!!!!
The pictures are spectacular and you need to do more of that!!!! I mean it. Love going along the water with you....felt like I was taking a walk with a good friend!!!

So glad to hear your daughter is progressing along...she has a good mommy to take care of her!

Victorian1885 said...

Hello Rose
You write so beautifully..there is nothing more precious than memories of Daddy and his little girl..I am sorry you lost yours so young..


Sue said...

LOVED your post and I too am a beach bum! Grew up near the beach and now am only a ten minute drive away. Seal Beach is my favorite and like you, I LOVE my ipod and my music is all over the place. Depends on my mood what I listen to. But the best part for me when I go to the beach, it just "frees" my head of all the garbage that it can sometimes get full of, you know? Something very cleansing about the sun, sand and surf! Thanks for reminding me. I'm off tomorrow, and just may have to take a little short trip to the beach myself!

Take care, Sue

Deby said...

beautiful Rose,
sweet memories and pain are all intermingled in this life we live. They help us to grow into wise women that can then be used to encourage to others....
Continue to build new memories of the beach, which will help the old bittersweet memories to intermingle and be ever more precious...
God bless you, in your journey...

Sylvia said...

Hi Rose, what a wonderful day you and your family had, it's good to take time off and sit and enjoy the surf of the ocean, sink your toes in the sand and let the sun warm you up. I can feel myself relaxing by just looking at your great photos.


Seawashed said...

You are so beautiful really shouldn't hide from the camera anymore...afterall your girls are gonna want a collection of photos left behind of you when you are not here anymore. Think of it as leaving them treasure. And your daughter takes wonderful shots!!! Looks like you had the most wonderful day...a day of restoration. I don't mind your music list...our weddings song was Thank You by Led Zepplin(my hubby's favorite) We've been listening to the Eagles all summer. One last thing...your hair is so long!!!!! so so beautiful and I love what you did with your hat. I was wearing mine all weekend too.

The Feathered Nest said...

Hi sweet girl!!!!! It is SO, SO GOOD to see a post from you...and what a WONDERFUL one it is!!! My goodness, the photos are just gorgeous!!! And of course I love seeing you, after talking so's good to see your sweet face. I hope you are doing wonderful Rose, hope to talk to you soon too!!! hugs and love, Dawn

My Pink & Cream Cottage said...

Hi Rose..... have just found your blog through beautiful Miss Rebecca & have really enjoyed reading your post. I love the b & w photos on the beach, they look great. Today is the last day of Winter in Australia & Im so looking forward to days down at the beach once the warmer weather arrives.
Hope your daughter is on the mend & thank you for sharing a touch of your life with me....

Lyn xxx

Anonymous said...

Beautiful, Rose! Memories, sunshine, family, photos....!

Romeo said...

Oh Rose....what a beautiful post! What beautiful memories and photos and written from the heart as you always do.....thank you so much for sharing.

I grew up in Florida and lived for the ocean. I miss it so much. And when I do go I can't get enough. It's such an incredible connection and like none other is it? And the perfect place to enjoy life's greatest moments....

Hugs Dear Rose!

"Her" and Romeo

Draffin Bears said...

Dear Rose,

What a beautiful post sweet friend.
Loved reading about the happy time you had at the beach and it was as if I was walking along beside you.
You are beautiful and loved seeing the photos of your day at the beach.
Special memories you have shared and I am sure your Daddy was looking down upon you.
I was so glad to hear that Ashley is doing well.
Take care and lovely to see you back.
Happy week

Fete et Fleur said...

Dearest Rose! It's so good to see you posting. What a gorgeous day on the beach and to share it with those you love makes it a perfect day! You are so CUTE!!


CIELO said...

Very lovely "sirena"... ;) Love the sea and all your pictures...


DEBBIE said...



Lisa said...

Oh you sweet long winded goober,
What a sweet post. I'm not at all surprised by your eccentric play list, it's as diverse & crazy as you sweet girl. What a great day to share with the fam. Those memories will last a lifetime for all of you. You look like a movie star goddess in those pics! For real, was the paparazzi following you around? The only thing missing from this post is a close up of your beautiful face! There I go, bossing you around. Try to call me tonight, Kevin has soccer. Lisa

Hearts Turned said...

What a beautiful post, Rose...I could really feel your love, joy and sadness, all rolled together's like that, isn't it? The things that are really important to us are rarely JUST happy or JUST sad--but a combination of it all.

Looks like you had such a lovely day--and you're beautiful, my friend!

So glad you're back to blogging...and I LOVE long posts! (apparently that's how I roll, too!)

Have a beautiful first day of September, Rose!


vikki said...


Julia @ Vintage with Laces said...

Hi sweet Rose, It's so wonderful to hear that Ashley is doing fine and is able to run again!!! You must have had so many worries over the last months. I'm happy to see you relaxing and having fun on the beach. I'm sorry to hear that being on the ocean brings back some sad memories for you at the same time.
I tried to be a vegetarian about 20 years ago. It worked for one year until I got a really, really bad craving for sausages, lol.
Have a wonderful weekend, dear friend!
Big hugs to you,

Dorthe said...

Sweet Rose,
what a beautifull post, full of wonderfull photoes,family memories, and love.
Most, the first words above your California blogging--touched my heart. How absolutely wonderfull ,that your daughter now are well, and able to runn and dance,laugh and smile, again---something to be realy thankfull for, and I know you are dear-it is fantastic, Rose.
Have a happy week-end dear friend,
Love and hugs, Dorthe

paperbird said...

all so very beautiful dear rose- I love the images, especially the first one- I can't believe it was taken with a mobile phone- it is gorgeous. i love southern california and i am very much missing the beautiful ocean- yo are so very blessed to live near,

take care and sweet blessings to you.

BailiwickStudio said...

I just happened upon your blog... I grew up in the South Bay, too - in Manhattan Beach to be exact. I'll always be a beach girl, even though I live in the desert right now. I remember those summer days of hanging out on the beach with friends, wandering through the stores downtown, and only having to be home by dinnertime. How times have changed, although the beach is as beautiful as it ever was! ::Jill

Rebecca said...

Hey Sweetie
It has taken me awhile with my craziness but I made it through your lonnnnggg asssss'd post and it was so beautiful!
Your daughter's eye for the camera is amazing and I love seeing your beautiful face.
You diffinately should go to the beach, it is you. The memories will flood but with time they will get sweeter.
Blessings dear sister

patricia said...

hola Rose,que bello nombre.....que lindo lo que cuentas,gracias por el traductor.
A mi tambien me seduce el mar el sol,las olas con su blanca espuma en un dia hermoso......cierro los ojos y me siento envuelta en ellas,que lindo compartir con los hijos en esos lugares verdad????
te mando un saludo desde Chile,recien estoy conociendo tu blog

Free Pretty Things For You said...

Miss u my dear friend!!!!!!!!

Candylei said...

I'm so happy that your daughter has healed up! Beautiful beach pictures with your girls. I am on the raw food diet now and I've noticed the bonus effects too.

Barbara Jean said...

just came by to say hi, and how are you doing??

Hope you and your family have a peaceful and blessed Christmas.


barbara jean

Small Holdings Farm said...

The beach/ocean is the place for me. I need to replenish myself at the shore...nothing works as well. Love your blog..insightful, tender and full of life. Sherron

Simple Home said...

I came over from Kerrie's blog. I grew up in So. Bay too. My husband still surfs so we try to get down there whenever we can. I spent most of my time at Manhattan Beach doing the same things you did.

So sorry about your dad. That must've been very hard.

Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

Good morning dearest! I come by way of Kerrie who just adores you, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I think we know each other....YES!!! YOU HAVE LONG HAIR...YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! are a sweetheart!

BESOS! BISES!!!!! Anita

Anne Marie said...

your good friend sea cottage linked you today, so I thought I 'd come by and say hello!

how wonderful to walk on the sand right now...I am surrounded by a beautiful snow, in my cozy farmhouse, but that beach looks great (I love sailing and anything with water!)

Anne Marie

Ines said...

Good Morning, Dear-

I found you at the Sea Cottage blog.

You are such a beauty!!!!!!!! Your photos make me dream- wonderful...

I have a little maltese named Ginger , too- such a darling!

I really love this blogdesign- it looks great!

Enjoy your day, Lovely-


Unknown said...

Awesome page ... your posts are always so serene & beautiful! Moments to remember & treasure of California ... the walks on the peach, the sunshine ... beautiful.

Have a beautiful day ~

Simple Daisy said...

Wow...what a beautiful day!!!Your photos are so lovely:)

steve said...

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romance-of-roses said...

Just found your blog and will follow you dear one. Best wishes for the recovery of your daughter. So sorry about your daddy. I also lost mine and I was an only child so very attached to my daddy. My daughter lives in Redondo Beach, has a restaurant in Manhattan Beach, she loves the beach too. Her husband was killed 3 years a go so my granddaughter now has no daddy and she was daddy's girl. She is now 25 and goes to Greece all the time, he was
Greek and she feels closer to him there.

romance-of-roses said...

Hello Rose, it's me again...sorry I did not finish my comment last night cause my phone rang and it was my daughter, the one that lost her husband, so I just closed off fast. Anyway wanted to tell you that I was so touched by your post, cried when I was reading it. I think girls and their daddy's have a special bond. I know that mine is my guardian angel, I can feel him sometimes and perhaps even hear his voice telling me what to do when I find myself in a situation.
Happy to have met you.

Unknown said...

I loved reading this post! I also love me some led zeplin and acdc. The pictures are so beautiful and that jelly fish was scary to me! Your post always make me feel good!

Jewellers Dublin said...

Love the images, so pretty. Engagement Rings

PlantWerkZ said...

The beach is so beautiful. You took some wonderful pictures. PlantWerkZ

Anonymous said...

I think it is a miracle and a blessing that your daughter found the strength to walk without aid on the day at the beach. It is a testament to her strength and willpower. I hope for more health and recovery.

PhD Jobs by Zoe David

Unknown said...

I’m crying over this beautiful post. Not only for the beautiful pictures, but the words are touching every place in my heart.


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